I was recently watching porn, as I am wont to do, and I was viewing a tasteful presentation of a bunch of dudes gangbanging a chick. During one scene, two guys were DPing the chick with one guy lying under the girl and the other guy on top. The guy on top was having a grand ol' time. The guy on the bottom, however, was not.
They kept fucking for a bit before the guy on the bottom pipes up with, "Dude, your balls."
"Oh, sorry bro." came the reply, and the guy on top reached down, grabbed his balls, pulled them up over his cock, and returned to pounding his splayed princess.
Chris and I got to thinking, what would you call that? We spent a good chunk of our drunken time in Kelowna thinking about it, along with some help from Dan. Finally, we had our answer.
I submit to you a brand new addition to the dictionary: Holstering. The act of pulling up your balls during DP to avoid slapping against the other dude.
Spread the word.
Monday, December 17, 2007
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Antics (In Stereo)
I spent some time getting ready for the trip to Kelowna by picking up some new blank CDs and burning an assload of music to listen to on the way there. When Chris and I hit the road, it didn't take long for us to get bored with the radio and move toward throwing in some good music.
Over the past few trips to Kelowna, my stereo had been slowly getting worse and worse. It finally decided to completely give up the ghost. We couldn't get any CD to play without skipping, burned or otherwise. After sitting in silence for about an hour, I checked the clock and noticed that it had only been 20 minutes.
"Fuck this, were going to get a stereo right now."
We pulled off in Chilliwack stopped in at a Canadian Tire. We found a nice deck pretty quick. It was solid amperage, had an aux in, played mp3 discs, and was a decent price. I picked it up (along with some tools) and headed out to the truck to install it.
Chris and I had just started ripping apart my dash when my Dad called.
"Hey, have you guys left yet?"
"Yeah, we're in Chilliwack installing a new stereo in my truck."
"Ha ha, oh yeah. So, have you actually left yet?"
"No really, we're in a Canadian Tire parking lot installing a new stereo. My old one broke."
"Right. Good luck with that."
Awesome.
We finished getting the old stereo out and hooked the new one in. The deck got power... sort of. Lights came on and I attempted to get a CD in. It didn't want to take it at first and the final grabbed onto it and slowly pulled it in. And with much pomp and circumstance, nothing happened. Sadly the wiring harness from the old deck didn't match up with the new deck.
Sadly, we were out of time and a rewiring job would have taken far too long, especially with the tools I had. We hit the road with no music.
The next day I installed it in my Dad's garage with no problems. The new stereo is in and sounds great. I'm looking forward to being able to use mp3 discs on my trip to Kelowna next week. Should be rad.
Over the past few trips to Kelowna, my stereo had been slowly getting worse and worse. It finally decided to completely give up the ghost. We couldn't get any CD to play without skipping, burned or otherwise. After sitting in silence for about an hour, I checked the clock and noticed that it had only been 20 minutes.
"Fuck this, were going to get a stereo right now."
We pulled off in Chilliwack stopped in at a Canadian Tire. We found a nice deck pretty quick. It was solid amperage, had an aux in, played mp3 discs, and was a decent price. I picked it up (along with some tools) and headed out to the truck to install it.
Chris and I had just started ripping apart my dash when my Dad called.
"Hey, have you guys left yet?"
"Yeah, we're in Chilliwack installing a new stereo in my truck."
"Ha ha, oh yeah. So, have you actually left yet?"
"No really, we're in a Canadian Tire parking lot installing a new stereo. My old one broke."
"Right. Good luck with that."
Awesome.
We finished getting the old stereo out and hooked the new one in. The deck got power... sort of. Lights came on and I attempted to get a CD in. It didn't want to take it at first and the final grabbed onto it and slowly pulled it in. And with much pomp and circumstance, nothing happened. Sadly the wiring harness from the old deck didn't match up with the new deck.
Sadly, we were out of time and a rewiring job would have taken far too long, especially with the tools I had. We hit the road with no music.
The next day I installed it in my Dad's garage with no problems. The new stereo is in and sounds great. I'm looking forward to being able to use mp3 discs on my trip to Kelowna next week. Should be rad.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Tool with Tools
It's been a long time since I've posted anything and I'm getting tired of looking at that downer of a post.
Chris and I just went down to Kelowna last weekend to see the Tool show. It was fucking rad. Unfortunately, its radocity was diminished some by how lame Kelowna can be.
First, they had these retarded constraints to get into the show that included no cell phones. Because of this, they were doing hardcore searches on everyone at the door. The doors opened at 6:30 and the first band hit the stage at 8. Tool hit at about 9 or so. They still hadn't got everyone in the door by the time Tool took the stage. Chris and I made it in to catch the last song and a half of the opening band, but what a fuck.
Second, Kelowna has an abnormally high concentration of douchebags and assholes. The idiots on the floor were breaking shit and hurting each other. It was bad enough that Maynard actually stopped the show at one point to clear things up. There was also some jackass with a laser pointer who kept shining it on Maynard. Eventually he tagged Maynard in the eye which, not surprisingly, pissed him off. All of this led to a couple songs being cut short and the set list being switched around and, sadly, no encore.
After the show we went to a club for some drinks, even though I was already totally stoned from the show. When we were done, we headed over to Denny's for some grub, but the taxi ride destroyed Chris and he was chucking for the rest of the night.
The rest of the trip was really good though. We chilled out at Laura and Dani's place the next night and played some drinking games. Laura and Dani even kissed which, suffice it to say, was totally rad.
For our last night, we went to Dan's place and had a few more drinks and watched a movie. We were all pretty trashed from the past few days, so we just took it easy and went and played some pool.
The drive back was brutal. It was snowing super hard. I couldn't see anything and the roads were terrible. I made a 4 hour trip into almost twice that.
Wicked weekend, overall. I got a new car stereo too. I'll talk about it a bit in a post in the next couple days.
Chris and I just went down to Kelowna last weekend to see the Tool show. It was fucking rad. Unfortunately, its radocity was diminished some by how lame Kelowna can be.
First, they had these retarded constraints to get into the show that included no cell phones. Because of this, they were doing hardcore searches on everyone at the door. The doors opened at 6:30 and the first band hit the stage at 8. Tool hit at about 9 or so. They still hadn't got everyone in the door by the time Tool took the stage. Chris and I made it in to catch the last song and a half of the opening band, but what a fuck.
Second, Kelowna has an abnormally high concentration of douchebags and assholes. The idiots on the floor were breaking shit and hurting each other. It was bad enough that Maynard actually stopped the show at one point to clear things up. There was also some jackass with a laser pointer who kept shining it on Maynard. Eventually he tagged Maynard in the eye which, not surprisingly, pissed him off. All of this led to a couple songs being cut short and the set list being switched around and, sadly, no encore.
After the show we went to a club for some drinks, even though I was already totally stoned from the show. When we were done, we headed over to Denny's for some grub, but the taxi ride destroyed Chris and he was chucking for the rest of the night.
The rest of the trip was really good though. We chilled out at Laura and Dani's place the next night and played some drinking games. Laura and Dani even kissed which, suffice it to say, was totally rad.
For our last night, we went to Dan's place and had a few more drinks and watched a movie. We were all pretty trashed from the past few days, so we just took it easy and went and played some pool.
The drive back was brutal. It was snowing super hard. I couldn't see anything and the roads were terrible. I made a 4 hour trip into almost twice that.
Wicked weekend, overall. I got a new car stereo too. I'll talk about it a bit in a post in the next couple days.
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